Written by I work at a high school and I was assigned a duty to watch an area during the two-day athletics carnival. The first thing I noticed as I stood thinking of all the very important things on my desk that I should be doing, was their behavior. The standard of support and enthusiasm the kids had for fellow teammates was outstanding; cheering and shouting out their names and words of encouragement, congratulations if they came first, commiserations if they came last. No booing, no brawling, no jeering, nothing like the brutish behavior that we frequently have seen when adults congregate.
It occurred to me that children are not good sports because we teach them to be, they are inherently good sports. Children are naturally inclusive and tolerant and accepting, I have come to believe that they are born with the necessary elements to contribute positively to a culture but these natural abilities become dulled over time as they grow. Society, stress, and general cynicism rob us of our innocent ways, but also the impact of poor examples and misguided and misapplied mentorship as well.
In a Twitter survey conducted by the International Institute for Tolerance it was indicated that 65.17% of the nearly 9000 participants believed that children were more tolerant than adults, and a further 18.49% believed that children were more likely to display tolerance than adults. Psychologists believe that because children aren’t ‘fixed’ and are in a state of flux as they develop, they are more open minded and receptive to change and adapting to differences. Younger people have also grown up in a more inclusive environment – the world has grown smaller in terms of the distances between people of different races, cultures, and religions.
Sadly, some adults impart bad attitudes and behaviors as they attempt to purge their own insecurities by living vicariously through children’s sporting accomplishments. This not only fails in addressing their own issues, but also places extreme pressure on children to be responsible for another person’s happiness.
“Hard work, fair play, loyalty and friendship are the scoreboards that actually matter. Focusing on these ideals equips children with skills and values that they can carry with them long after they have hung up their boots. For parents that are passionate about their children’s success in sport a little self-reflection goes a long way. Why do we really want our children to play and succeed in sport? Is it about them or us?
Sport can be placed into a healthy perspective, one where it represents a way to be a better human being rather than simply a way to better the competition.” – Clyde Rathbone, Former Wallaby and co-founder Karma-wiki
In our effort to ‘educate’ our youth, we have perhaps got the curricula a bit skewed. In our endeavors to guide them towards being better sportspeople with positive attitudes, we are at risk of confusing their innate sense of fairplay and tolerance with our misguided values and insecurities. We may talk a good game but are adults often guilty of conflagrating sporting success with an essential virtue, or even believing that sporting success overrides such virtues? No wonder children are confused.
So, what is the answer?
Acknowledging children have an inbuilt moral compass that needs to be nurtured rather than overwritten for one. And secondly, being mindful that the lessons we impart should not be about ‘us’ but focused on building positive attitudes toward sport, people, and society in general.
Perhaps it’s not a case of teaching children to be tolerant, but instead, a case of don’t teach them to be wary and suspicious of people who are different. Adults appear to be more the problem than children.
https://www.playbytherules.net.au/resources/articles/why-adults-behave-like-kids-at-kids-sport